i admit that i fell in love deeply and in return, the feelings and intentions are mutual... to the point that you
cannot sleep at night just because he is not yet home... to the point that everything is so clear that you are
smiling everyday, thinking of songs that will actually depict your happiness, leveling to sky high rocket, because
you know that somebody is there to catch you when you fall...allm of these will only stick to one word... LOVE.
it came to me that i have known him so much, that even i had the chance to mingle with his family. to the extent
that i slept with him on nhis parent's house, something that i do not usually do. i appreciate it most if we will
go back to his home and will spend quality time together as if we do not have any time left... love had conquered
our loneliness and emptiness for just holding each others hands and saying "hey, I LOVE YOU..."
but as like any other movie, there is the fighting point, wherein you don't know if trust was placed properly, or
if you really love each other. there are times that your distance means a lot, to the extent that one of you will
question if you really are still intact. what i am pointing is that why do you need to doubt when you already held
my hand? it is not an alibi that i fell in love so fast, but the thing is, do you trust the way i trust you? or is
this just like a bubble gum that after the taste had gone, you can easily throw it all away? this is not what i am
thinking and wishing that will happen, this is something out of hand...
as day passes, my birthday will soon arrive... first time that i will celebrate it with someone whom i really fell
in love with. we planned and continue sharing thoughts, to the point that i am willing to stay unemployed just to
be with him. but then again, the fantasy and the magic we are planning turned into reality. 1 day after my special
day, fighting was extended. doubts and suspicious mind took over and we end up losing what we have saved. i looked
forward for a happy ending but what is left is a special birthday that i celebrated. a special day with my laptop,
reading overwhelming greetings and responses. it made me smile for a moment and left a tear inside, knowing that
one person had to greet me in a specific, memorable way... which never happened and will never happen again...
time passed and the day of his leaving came... no clues, no updates, no messages and no goodbyes. just a thinking
that probably, he left just like that... clueless in more ways but i need to remain at peace. some said we need to
talk, some said we need to let go, some said i need to pray... but i did nothing above all.
what is inside me are questions, questions and questions... why, why oh why... why is it you left like that? why
you never asked me to talk to to you when you know that we decided to go on? why you just doubt like that, knowing
that you are the only one i exchanged my heart with? and why you decided to let go, when you are the one who
uplift all of my feelings from the start? sigh, sigh. sigh...
as he flown away, he took away something from me... the happiness that i never felt with someone else... the smile
i wore when we are together... the belongingness and care he did and most of all, the love that can never be
repeated in a lifetime...
as of now, im holding on and at the same time letting go... holding on for all what we had is still lingers in my
mind, holding on for the beautiful days... letting go for a fact that i needed to be okay, letting go for almost
the whole of me is drifting apart... letting go coz i know if i stayed, the longer ill go deeper and it is harder
tfor me to walk away...
I LOVE YOU and THANK YOU, that is all i can say... i may never asked for another chance nor asking for you to come
back... i just need you to know that you are being thought of every day, valued and loved, the way i know it is
supposed to be. if love is not enough for you to stay, i hope my thoughts and care will be a turning point because
i know that when the day i met you, and when the day we knew that we belong, you cared and thought of me first,
before you saved my love and let go...
I won't see your smile
And I won't hear you laugh
I won't see you walk
Through that door
'Cause time wasn't on your side
It isn't right
I can't say I love you
It's too late to tell you
But I really need you to know
Oh baby no
I'll never forget you
I'll never let you out of my heart
You will always be here with me
I'll hold on to the memories baby
Now baby can you hear me
Wherever you may be
Are you near me
I need you to be
By my side
'Cause I never said goodbye
It isn't right
I should have said I love you
Why didn't I just tell you
God knows I need you to know
Somewhere I know you'll be with me
Someday in another time
But right now you're gone
You just vanished away
But I'll never leave you behind